Identity Memo

Chris McMillian

Researcher Identity Memo for a Study of College Athletes Mental

State on Education as they go Through School

Being a former athlete myself who once had dreams of playing professional basketball after college I thought it would be great idea to examine the thought process of student athletes as the dreams they once had of playing a professional becomes a distant thought. As a freshman I would have told anybody that I was going to play in the NBA or at minimum have a very long pro career over in Europe. To be perfectly hones I had that same feeling up until I broke my fibula in 5 places playing softball the summer before my senior year. I can remember sitting in the emergency and the thought of, “your careers over “ running through my head over and over again. I was at a point when I realized that there is a strong possibility that my dream of paying pro ball could have just been shattered right along with my leg.  I knew I was going to have to work really hard in order to make a comeback in the same year, I did all in my power but the injury I sustained was just too great. I wound up taking a redshirt year and a freshman point guard stepped in to fill my role. The following year out head coach had a tough decision to make, between his now sophomore point guard or his senior veteran.  In the end my coach opted to go with the sophomore for fear that if he didn’t that he would ultimately transfer. Because playing us both wasn’t an option I spent my senior year sitting the bench wondering what I was going to do after I graduated. “Shell shock” is the only term I can use to explain what it was I went through once it was all over. I had spent my entire life working so hard at accomplishing one thing, and now that basketball was no longer a career choice I was forced to adapt and take the real world on the only way that I knew how.  I was always a decent student and despite my love for basketball and my drive to play on a professional level I always knew deep down that education was important and I would need one just in case basketball didn’t workout.  After my disappointing year I vowed I would never pick up a basketball ever again. I moved to Scottsdale Arizona where I lived and worked in the fitness industry. After 6 years of working 60hr workweeks and constantly being pushed to hit a sales quota I decided to go back to my first love. I write this memo today almost 2 years to the day of moving from AZ as a graduate assistant coach at the University of Hawaii for the Men’s Basketball team. There is no doubt in my mind that there are other out there like myself who could find a way to survive if for some reason they were not able to play as a professional sports, but what about the guys that don’t take education serious? What happens to the athletes that aren’t ready to face the harsh reality that their time playing sports is over? 

Over the next 2 months I want to interview 20 student athletes from both the Men’s Basketball team and the Football team. I will interview 5 freshman and sophomore and 5 juniors and seniors, I will ask them a series of questions to find out what intentions they had when the walked on this campus as freshman and how their mindset has changed as the years continue to go by. I can count dozens of student athletes that I feared for in the event they weren’t able to play professional ball. For many of them I didn’t know how they would hold down a real job because education and social skills was not a priority to them. Over the years athletes have been looked at as dumb jocks, at what point will student athletes all begin to take education and life outside of sports more serious.

I believe that with my background that I have many advantages with this topic. I have not only seen first had how student athletes go thru the different stages of college, but I myself have lived it. I am going to be able to put myself in each of my subject’s shoes as I am interviewing them therefore creating a common ground, which will hopefully allow them to open up to me more so then if a non athlete with no experience on the subject was interviewing them.  My ultimate goal is to find out the thought processes of each of my athletes as they go through their college careers as well as have the seniors that I interview who are not going on to play professional sports look back on their freshman and sophomores of college and tell me how much their mindsets have changed towards life and education over the years. This project hits very close to my heart and I hope that I can change the mindset of one of these young men as they begin to approach their college career.